Tuesday, April 13, 2010
No Not My Mouth But My Mama's (And Uncle's)
My friend was telling me a story the other day about how her mother was prattling on and on in front of some people telling things that embarrassed her and were really Too Much Information. TMI. I said, just put your hand over her mouth.
What? Put a hand over your Mama's mouth?
Of course, it's much better than the alternative. Now isn't it?
Let me explain. My mother dearly loved to talk, and especially to tell things. Especially things about me. For instance, Angelyn got a raise, and now she's making ......dollars an hour!!! Can you believe that? Angelyn and David bought a .......can you believe how much they spent on that? Angelyn has got to have surgery on her.....because she is......
Now do you see what I mean?
So when she would TMI me, I would smile sweetly at whomever was on the receiving end of the TMI, shrug my shoulders and very very gently put my had over her mouth.
And they always got it.
Always. 'Cause I'm pretty sure if any you my sweet readers be truthful, your Mama has done the same thing to you.
My uncle is also a rattler. And I was thinking the other day after leaving the Nursing Home, is this where I got my "Rattling Around In My Head" stuff?
I usually just sit there and half listen. I key in about every 50 words or so, unless I hear something kinda crazy. Like the other day he was rattling, I wasn't listening until I heard the word "creosote." That's right, creosote. I never said a word, but apparently he thinks that the housekeeping staff may clean the floors with something like creosote.
Sometimes when I call him, and he is in a rattling mood I put him on the speaker phone and go about my business. I have even taken a shower with him just rattling on and on.
Last year I had him in the doctor's office, I was trying to tell the doctor what I thought was wrong and he was yada yada yadaing. I very sweetly put my hand over his mouth and finished telling the doctor what I needed to tell him. The doctor was not shocked, he understood. If you know my uncle, you understand.