Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Cost Rica

Our minister of music asked me to give my testimony about going to Costa Rica.  I have read that the fear of public speaking is greater than the fear of death.  This is true for me, but I knew that it was something that I needed to do. My testimony is below.
(This is a picture from the front porch of the compound.)
(And this is the URL for their blog.)
The Kingdom
This is my conversation with God on the way home from church after Bro. Chris announced that our church was going on a Medical Mission trip to Costa Rica.
Yes Lord?
Bro. Chris said the church is going on a Medical Mission trip to Costa Rica.
Yes Lord.
You are a nurse.
Yes Lord.
You could go.
Yes Lord.
You are about to be 56 years old.
Yes Lord.
And you have spent most of those years doing things for your self.
Yes Lord.
And it's real easy to write out a check to Lottie Moon or Margaret Lackey missions isnt' it?
Yes Lord
And you are really selfish with your time and effort aren't you?
Yes Lord.
So don't you think it's time you got out of your comfort zone and actually DO something for My Kingdom?
Yes Lord....and I'm taking David with me!!!
The Doubts
Doubts began to creep in. 1. I'm "fluffy." 2. I have health issues.  3.  I'm scared of "not water."  Some people are afraid of water, I'm afraid of not having water.  Because we didn't have running water in our house until I was about 10 years old, and it was my responsibility to draw the well water, I have always been very respectful of water as a precious commodity.  In the times when we have been without water, David will tell you--I am crazy.  All I can think about is water.  I need to brush my teeth, I need to wash my hair, I need to take a shower, I need to go to the bathroom.  I need water!
I addressed these doubts to the team because I wanted to be a blessing not a burden.  The team reassured me that if God wanted me to go, all my needs would be taken care of.  So that's out of the way.
The Passport and The Rock
I began to make lists, gather data, calculate medication costs, talk to another nurse that had gone, had her come and talk to the team...I had done everything except one little tiny crucial thing...I procrastinated about our passports.  See David was having doubts and two passports are a expensive commodity if you never use them.  Everybody was asking me, have you gotten you passport yet?  I would say no...but I'm working on it....The time came down to the lat minute and David and I had a heart to heart talk.  I told him that I didn't care if he didn't want to go. I needed him to go.  I was afraid to go without him.  David is my safety net.  He makes me feel safe, he will take a bullet for me.  He is my rock, and quite frankly, Kingdom or no Kingdom, I wasn't going without him.  God intervened and David committed to go.  We had to jump through quite a few hoops to get our passports quickly and pay extra and got them in time.
The Hair.
Except for one time for medical reasons, I have had my hair long.  Not long after I made the commitment to go to Costa Rica, I became obsessed with the idea that I had to cut my hair.  Not trim, but cut, short.  Very short.  At first I thought the reason was because if water was in short supply I wanted most of my water to go below my neck.  (If you get my drift)  And it would be easier to care for--wash and go. And it also seemed to me to be a visual reminder, or covenant if you will of my commitment to go.  So I cut it.  My hairdresser said she had never cut hair from that length (below my shoulders) to an inch or so.  (The pony tail went to Lock of Love) However, after I cut it I found out the real reason I was so obsessed with cutting it.  People who know me and people who don't know me, but know me..does that make sense say "You cut your hair!!!" Which gives me the opportunity to say, let me tell you why...and will you please pray for us? 
If you are a praying person, please pray for us.
For me:  Pray that God will give me a spirit of strength and courage...and water...that there will be water in adequate supply.
For David:  That God will show him what the other reason(s) are for him to go. (I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only reason.)
For our marriage:  That it will be strengthened and we will bond in a way we never have before.
For our team:  That we will be safe, that we will have wisdom and discernment as we minister to their physical and spiritual needs.  That they will see Jesus in our faces, and feel Jesus' touch in our touch.
Pray Pray Pray...and Pray some more!!!


Sketching with Dogs said...

I wouldn't say I was more afraid of public speaking than death but it really freaks me out! I once had to give a talk at work and my voice shook like mad. Then this horrible woman at the back shouted "can you speak up" and I wanted to hit her, LOL.
Hope it was a good trip, the thought of things is always worse than actually doing them. You are a strong woman and you should remember that!
It must have been very hard growing up without running water, most people can't even imagine, including me.
Lynne x

DollZandThingZ said...

I love what you wrote--everything. I think you will have a wonderful trip, but I hope that your health will stay fine. You will have my thoughts & prayers. Positive vibrations sent your way! Not sure whether you have left and returned already...but wishing you the best!