Sunday, August 30, 2009

Another Averyism

Avery's mama brought her over yesterday afternoon--she was going to spend the night with us.She and her mama had spent most of the day in the swimming pool. This is our conversation.
Me: Come on Avery, let's go get our baths now instead of later.
Avery: No, I don't need one, I've already had a chlorine bath.
Me: Oh.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Look What I Got.

Look what I got in the mail last Thursday!!!
My BBFF (Blogging Best Friend Forever) Kate Spike sent me this in the mail. She made the necklace--isn't it pretty? And she made the box that she mailed it to me in also--isn't it cool?
I have made the most wonderful friends out here in blog land. They are all so talented and fun. Visit Kate here and leave a comment to let her know you stopped by, she will love to hear from you.
Oh and her cat Poonie has a blog as well, visit him here ---he is hilarious.
Thanks Kate--I love the necklace and the box too. I wore the necklace to work and all the girls loved it.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

It Just Goes To Show You........

If you talk about it enough, somebody will buy it for you.
Ever since I saw the Bumpit on TV, I have told everybody who would listen that I wanted one. They all know that I love big hair. I can't stand my hair too flat on my head. So my BFF Celia, either because she loves me or to shut me up, bought me one.
The only thing is my head is kinda big and wide and it doesn't fit too good, but I'm wearing it right this minute. I really think the secret is the teasing comb, but it does give you a full look.
Thanks Ceila!!

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Random Rattles

As you know things rattle in my head, and the only way to get them out is put them on here.
So here are some random "rattles."
At work something strange happens when I got to the bathroom--the phone rings. I can sit at my desk for hours with nothing and then just let me go to the the BR...and the phone rings. Do you think I have an antennae in my bottom that interfaces with some kind of magnet in the toilet seat that makes the phone ring? 'Cause I never make it there in time. Never. So I'm not really sure if there is actually someone on the line...
And speaking of phones, why does every phone in the world now only ring 4 times? I can never get to it in time. And why is it when I call the person right back (thanks caller ID) they never answer? Why?
Is there a website that I can go to (like the do not call list) to tell McDonald's I do not now or ever want an iced latte? I asked them the other day when were they going to stop asking that question and they said never. Can you imagine? What is the deal, do they have too many and they need to get rid of them? I really don't think that we are too big on iced coffee here in the south. Maybe they could just give them away.......
My husband could nap professionally. Or maybe if it was an Olympic Sport...he would be very good at it. I bet you thought that naps were just plain naps. TLOML has different ones for different times/occasions...the early morning nap--get up at 4AM, got outside to drink a cup of coffee, and smoke a cigarette, then go back to bed and get up around 5:30 to get ready for work, or later if not prandial naps--which depends on the meal, if you have been up really early and eat breakfast then you take a nap after breakfast, if you skip breakfast then you nap after lunch/brunch....the pre-bedtime nap--which is just as it seems, you take a nap before you go to bed......
I guess that's about all for now....I feel better getting that all out.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Dirty Sweaty Greasy Men

I have a new guilty pleasure, which I just discovered this past Saturday.
Yeah it's a new reality TV show. Black Gold--and I watched the whole 2008 season off and on Saturday.
It's like a soap opera, only with millions of dollars at stake and hot, dirty, sweaty men who are all barking alpha dogs but not in the alpha dog position. (Does that make sense?)
There are drillers, roughnecks and worms, each with a certain job and a very rigid pecking order.
If you can't take cussing even though it's bleeped out--don't watch.
The job is tough, dangerous and stressful and according to the website, the 5th most dangerous job in the world--drilling for oil in Texas.
It just goes to show you though, no matter what your job is, people are all the same, and the same little tempests in teapots go on no matter where you work.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Mexican Stand Off Part Quatro.

This morning I woke up thinking about a promise I made to God. There is a little story behind it so here goes.
About 3 years ago TLOML and I were separated for 3 days literally and 3 months in the same house while we worked things out.
With the help of a great therapist, God, and willing hearts we were able to work things out. We completely reconciled on New Years Eve. During the time we were seperated I prayed fervently for God to restore us and I made Him a promise.
I promised Him if he would just bring TLOML home I would quit complaining about his underwear in the floor, never closing the drawers on his bureau, the mess under the carport etc. etc.
And this morning I woke up thinking about that promise and if I loved him more that some dumb stuff in the sink.
Well of course I do. And he probably doesn't even see it anymore (thanks Kate) and even if he is messing with my head--so what. He can win. I don't have to. I love him more than winning.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Mexican Stand Off Part Tres

He has ratcheted it up another notch and I'm not sure that I'm going to make it.
In some ways it is getting easier, some ways much harder. He keeps surprising me. #4 grandchild spent the night Friday night and this Capri sun was left on the kitchen table. Weeelllll, Saturday morning what do you think was in the sink with the Mikidee cup and the door knocker? That's right, the Capri Sun juice bag....and it only has a little bit of the juice in the it could easily have gone in the garbage.
He's good. Very very good. Better than good--brilliant.
But I won't budge. I have cleaned the kitchen several times this weekend, wiped out the sink and put the stuff right back in there.
He is messing with my head......isn't he?
But I will leave it there till pigs fly. Or September the 12, when I'm hosting a bridal luncheon...or I could just move the stuff under the sink that day and then put it back after the luncheon....I've got to think ahead and stay on my toes if I'm going to win this stand off.
Oh and CiCi and GinGin did just fine after their surgery. It only slowed them down for about a day.
If anybody has any suggestions, I'm open.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Puppy Love

The Deathscan, I mean Lexiscan did not kill me and the cardiac nuclear scan of my heart was okay. I'm feeling better.

As for the Mexican Standoff, the cup and the door knocker are still in the sink....I've lost count of the days.

I continue to clean up the kitchen and leave them right there...but I may go to another tactic (if I can stand it) I may leave the kitchen dirty, with the sink full of dishes until TLOML decides to clean it up....there's no fungus in the cup yet--I check every day.

On another note, Ginger is going out of heat as Priscilla is coming in. The dog next door is in torment. His name is Levi. Even when CiCi and GinGin are not in heat they go over there and tease him. He has one of those collars that keeps him in his yard...except the electric fence/collar has nothing on the power of love. The both of them being in heat, makes him quite brave. If the girls go out in the yard he is over here pronto--shock or no shock.
I wonder if TLOML would take a shock for me?
Sometimes he comes to the French doors, scratches on the door and says Ms. Angel, can CiCi and GinGin come over to my house for a little while? Please? Please? I've got that new DVD that's out-- Beverly Hill's Chihuahua, and I know they would just love it....ah puppy love.
It will all be over tomorrow--'cause tomorrow they are going to the Vet to be spayed.
I'll be off the weekend and will be able to wait on them hand and paw.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

It's Called Lexiscan....

but maybe it should be a ride at Disney World called "Heart Attack Simulation."
Since I last had a case of asthmatic bronchitis, and I was sooo short of breath with any exertion, my doctor ordered a cardiac stress test with "Lexiscan." Oh and my cholesterol is in the unmentionable range--and I can't take any of the statins--they make me feel like I have the flu and make my muscles weak, and I'm a big girl--okay obese.
Anyway... you don't walk on the tread mill to dilate your coronary arteries--this medication does it for you. Isn't modern medicine great? There are so many ways to diagnose your problem and make you feel bad and scared at the same time.
And I want to insert a warning here, any time a medical person says these words..."now this may make you...." be prepared for the worst--because if you are unlucky like me it will make you have whatever side effects are listed.
My left arm (where I had my IV anchored and they pushed the medication IV) felt like lead. And my chest felt like, well lead light. The tech was saying take deep breaths==breathe in and out slowly and will be over soon...the paramedic said and very sweetly I might add....."honey you have to let go of my hand now so that I can take your blood pressure...."
It was over in a minute or two...but it seemed longer.
I'll get the results tomorrow and I'll keep you posted.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Mexican Stand Off Continued...

I'm beginning to think that I'm out of my league and that I can't compete on TLOML's level. He has kicked the stand-off up to another level all together.
Please note the picture above.
Night before last, right before I went to bed, I took a look in the sink and noted the door knocker. The conversation follows.
Me: Honey what is this in the sink?
TLOML: That's the door knocker from the house on Sterling street. I found it when I was cleaning out the shop and I thought that I would clean it up and blah blah blah, yada yada yada.
Me: Oh.
Okay, I admit it, he is good. Very very good. It has now been in the sink for three nights in a row along with the Mikidee drink. I have cleaned the kitchen at least three times since the previous blog, and each time I picked up both the drink and the door knocker, cleaned the sink and put them back.
He knows my weaknesses--namely a place for everything and everything in it's place.
But I'm standing firm I'm not putting the d@^^# cup in the garbage and the door knocker can stay in the sink until hell freezes over. I won't mention is day 6 that the cup has been in the sink.
How can he not have noticed that I have cleaned the kitchen time after time and the cup is still in the sink!!!!!! And the door knocker in the sink, is he trying to push me over the edge?
Oh and I forgot to tell you----!!! I saw one of my good hand towels in the middle of the yard fell off the tractor!!! Is he trying to drive me crazy?
In a much earlier post I noted that I had given up on him using the fine everyday china coffee cups and leaving them all over creation. (namely in the garage--and I find them with Penicillin growing in them) I couldn't win. I kept them hid in the bathroom for years until we moved to this new house and he found them. And besides, I wanted to have them in my new I gave up. Now understand, we have dozens of mismatched cups that are in another cabinet...but will he use them???? Nooooo he uses the company china.
Okay, okay calm down. Maybe my medicine will kick in within the next few days........

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Is It Really A Mexican Stand Off If...

the other party doesn't know it's going on or is pretending like he isn't standoffing? Let me explain, it all started Wednesday night. I had cleaned the kitchen till it was spick and span. The Love Of My Life, went to Mickidees and got him something to eat. I noticed before he and I went to bed that he had left the drink on the counter, a butchered tomato on the counter and a mess in the sink. I went to bed and left it in a mess. I didn't touch it all the next day.

Buuuuttt Thursday afternoon when I got home, I noticed that TLOML had sorta cleaned the sink and put the tomato in the garbage....buuuuttt he put the drink intact in the sink. Why he didn't empty it and put the cup in the garbage I have no idea. It's not like the garbage can is in Siberia, it is 2 feet from the sink.
Sooo, it is now Sunday night, I have cleaned the kitchen twice on Saturday and twice today. I pick up the cup, rinse out the sink and put it right back. I'm not moving the d@^^> cup even if hell freezes over. I don't care if it rots, I don't care if mold and fungolia grow in there--I'm not moving it. I'm going to wait it out. I want to see how long he will leave it there.
A friend of mine is my hero. She left a pair of her husband's jeans on the back of his recliner (after he put them there) for four weeks. He only moved them after he invited company over. She is my hero.
We could get a pool going on how long it will stay there...I'll keep you posted. If I knew how to put a countdown widget on here I would........

Friday, August 7, 2009

Something That I Struggle With Is...

sarcasm, being snarky, and overall smart a$$ness. I am not a whiner, complainer or cynic. I'm an optimist and I think that I generally have a cheerful and fun personality, but I am snarky. It is one thing about me that drove my mother crazy. She used to tell me that I was just like my daddy's cousin Nellie something.
I usually can keep it in check, but sometimes impulsive smart alecky things just roll out of my mouth milliseconds after they form in my brain.
For instance, this morning, I'm at the breakfast table and I ask L., "do you eat all that fruit because you like it, or for your bowels?"
I'm half smart alecky and half sincere, because I don't like fruit. I will eat it, but I have to force myself, and I'm amazed that people actually like apples and oranges. (see yesterday's post--this could have been added)
We did go own to have a nice conversation about fruit, she craves it (I can't imagine) and doesn't feel satiated if she doesn't have a piece of fruit every morning with her breakfast. (I am in awe of her) And she is not fat like me either.

Justify Full
And another thing that drives me crazy (again this needs to be added to yesterday's post) is those sun visor cap things. I hate almost all caps, but those sun visor/golf cap things drive me wild.
My SIL wears them and puts them on #5--which I hide as soon as my SIL is not looking.
Yesterday my friends and I had lunch at the Pizza Inn. I looked over at the table next to me and this guy had one on, and it was pulled down so low over his eyes, you would have thought that we were eating outside in bright sunshine on a beach.
His girlfriend had on a cap and she too had hers pulled down over her eyes. I looked over at my friends and said..."do you think they are hiding from the mob?" Honestly, it was all I could do to restrain myself from going over there, looking up under the bill of his visor and asking him that question.
That's when it dawned on're off your medication.
Let me explain, a couple of years ago, I went through a trauma and started on Lexapro, after I got better, I tried to wean myself off........but I just couldn't get off of friends would ask me, "are you off your medicine?" It seems that Lexapro (I'm now on generic Celexa 'cause it works as well and is $4.00) smooths my rough edges, improves the filter between my brain and my mouth, which gives me a more time to do I really want to say that, (but rarely stops the snarky thoughts).
I had run out of it and kinda of procrastinated on getting it filled and after a few days, thought well....maybe I'll try to get off of it one more time.
Got it filled today...I know my friends are glad.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Am I The Only One Who....

......doesn't understand, okay doesn't like, okay okay can't stand poetry. I'm really ashamed to admit this because I think it says a lot about my shallowness. I don't get most of the metaphors and I'm terrible at allegorical stuff. I have blogger friends that write poetry and post it. And honestly I try to read it, but I never get past the second line and rarely past the first. It annoys me. And Haiku...I have read the definition of that dozens of time, and I still don't get it.

.........has not read a single Harry Potter book, nor seen any of the movies and has absolutely no desire to do either.
doesn't like...okay can't stand sports of any kind. That's right nada, none. The only time I ever watch a sport of any kind is the Super Bowl because we make a money board and it's kinda like betting....but somebody wins something at the end of each quarter....I couldn't begin to tell you what a point spread is...oh and if my daughter is playing tennis and I have been shamed by my friends and family and it's not too hot and the seats aren't to hard, and it's not to far to walk--I'll go watch her game. That's my limit. When she was in high school and played everything, and cheered and was drum major--I was in hell. But I went and acted joyful about it. Acted. I couldn't understand why she and David would have apoplexy if I wanted to take a book to the games and read. I was a big embarrassment to them. Oh yeah and I learned how to pretend that I understood what was going on--I cheered if everybody else did and cried when everybody else did. I became quite good at acting.

....didn't care for, okay didn't like the movie "Titanic." I couldn't stand Leonardo and Kate in this movie. But I really loved Leonardo as Howard Hughes and what was that other movie where he was that forger? I liked him in that. And I like Kate now in almost anything she does. I was always interested in reading about the Titanic and we went to the traveling Titanic thing, and it was wonderful...but I just hated the movie.
....never reads a book twice. Never.
...never watches a movie twice. Never.
...becomes extremely annoyed when someone denigrates The President. He is the leader of the free world. He is the chief of the greatest country in the world. And even if I don't vote for him, I do not denigrate him. Of course it is fine to disagree and say why you disagree, but it is another thing to disparage him. Hilary Clinton. I think that she is the sharpest tool in the shed in DC. I don't dare mention this at the breakfast table at work--all the men tell me I'm crazy. But these same men said she wouldn't be Secretary of State either. And she's probably more effective as Secretary of State than she would have been as president.
....and lastly--can't make change. Please don't waste your time in trying to explain to me how to count it back etc...many have tried and all have failed. There is some cell in my brain that is missing when it comes to numbers.
....I'm sure there is more if I thought about it, but that's all for now.